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Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Carb It

"It is a hard matter, my fellow citizens, to argue with the belly, since it has no ears." ~Plutarch

I will readily admit that I went through an ephedrine phase, by way of Xenadrine. After the FDA decided that ephedra is terrible on the system and Xenadrine did away with it, they tried to claim that the new stuff was the same as the old stuff. It so wasn’t.

(side note: I also went through other poor dieting phases, that my mother would die if she knew about. And it’s not me not being honest, because if you were to ask me I’d be like “hell yes”, but for right now, use your imagination as to exactly what ‘other poor dieting phases’ are. I’m sure your imagination will lead you to the proper conclusions)

Ok, it’s not like I had nor have serious weight problems or anything like that. And it takes months for it to be noticeable that I’ve gained or lost weight, because I’m tall enough and in proportion, but yes I did go the ‘drug’ route to lose weight. And holy hell I lost a lot of it. At the same time, Peg had jumped on the Atkins bandwagon. For years with her working and Garrett and I have multiple activities, dinners consisted of Burger King and McDonalds. I was eating Big Macs at the tender age of 5 (but I was such an adorable chubby little girl).

Growing up it’s not like I was inactive and just sat around watching TV all day. I did ballet, tap, jazz, cheerleading, soccer, threw shot put and discus and some running. When I came to AU instead of gaining 15-20lbs, I lost 15. Awesome. I was the girl that was at the gym every day at 6:30 AM. The next fall, around Thanksgiving of my Sophomore year, I started taking Xenadrine. That shit made me so ill that I didn’t want to eat. And when I did eat, my meals consisted of a veggie burger and cantaloupe and an excessive amount of OJ (the calcium fortified kind, thank you very much).

The whole take Xenadrine, feel like shit, plan worked out nicely; with a lovely 60lbs weight loss, after which I was told that I look anorexic. Even Peg was a little shocked that I had lost more weight than she had even though we started at the same time (ahem, that’s what getting up at 6 AM for the gym gets you). Oh wait, see that weight loss high, I was just on? Yup, gone. I think that I’ve managed to gain well over half of it back.

But let’s face it, I stopped paying attention. Nicole Ritchie can pull off the anorexic look, I can’t. Nicole Ritchie has also never worked on a campaign, in which all you do is eat, worry, work, then eat some more. Then four months in Spain, although I did lose 10lbs there, I gained it all right back upon setting foot in Dulles (I’ve been deprived of Chipotle for four months, I deserve to have it twice a week for a month. Asshole.)

There was a time, when I actually cared and worried. I go to the gym, I do yoga, I’m not just sitting around doing nothing. And hell yes, I’m going to eat. I will have potatoes for breakfast, maybe even a breakfast sandwich on a biscuit; hell, throw in pizza with eggplant parmagiana and linguine with pesto ON TOP of pizza crust. I don’t care.

Just remind me to wake up and go for that run in the morning. Damn.


Blogger Lizzie said...

Wow- great minds! I was thinking of posting something on weight issues too. (Don't be offended if I still do.)

I can relate to a lot of what you say. I think it just all comes down to genetics though. A year and a half ago I was leading a very unhealthy lifestyle- no sleep, too many cigarettes and too much alcohol (the really unhealthy kind where you drink a whole bottle of wine by yourself on your couch -- everynight). Now I'm training for my third marathon in a year and throughout the whole process I've only lost about 10 pounds. Not that I'm doing it to lose weight, but if I can't lose more than that doing what I'm doing, it's just never coming off. I've never been obsessed with my weight so I can't say I care all that much. In a way, it's comforting that it's out of my hands (I say as I'm eating a giant bowl of ice cream).

Well, that was just about everything I was thinking of posting. So either I won't post about it after all or I'll just copy and paste one day when I have blogger's block :-)

7:18 PM  
Blogger Sub Girl said...

i'm battling the lbs. now too! about a year or two ago i was THIN. but i wasn't healthy-thin: i smoked too much, but exercised a lot. i also used xenadrine, but it gave me a light-headed feeling. now, since, then, i've gained like 15 lbs and i don't really smoke anymore, and am sorta exercising regularly, but i can't seem to shed the extra weight. i just don't want to buy all-new larger-sized pants for this season!

7:13 AM  
Blogger Heather B. said...

Oh yes, I forgot to mention that I was a smoker as well. Thankfully I've stopped, save, those four cigarettes I had last week. I'm contemplating a marathon for next year, so we shall see on that.
Today for the record, I've had grilled cheese, fries and a chipwhich. Next week I'm back on the 'program'...which means NOT eating french fries everytime I crave them. damn.

3:08 PM  
Blogger Lizzie said...

You should totally run a marathon. one of the coolest things I've ever done. I became hooked after my first one.

4:10 PM  
Blogger Sub Girl said...

i loooove fries. what is a chipwich? i'm eating a bagel this morning. with lots of cream cheese. mmm. but i worked out last night!

how does one become hooked on mararthons??

7:25 AM  
Blogger Heather B. said...

A chipwhich is two chocolate chip cookies with ice cream in the middle. They also make them with oreo cookies. Don't know how one gets hooked on marathons, but I think I might try. We'll see.

9:40 AM  
Blogger Geoffrey Hirschfeld said...

I really liked your post. I know, a guy posting about weight loss is pretty wierd, but I have lost about 85 lbs in the past 2 years, and kept most of it off(I gain a few, lose a few here, and I am starting on a losing stage again). I understand the whole body image thing-it is amazing how differently people look at you when you are skinny(or supposedly skinny).

I have this to say, however-women look better when they have curves. Screw the fashion industry, Kate Moss and co, and whoever decides what is beautiful or not-they are nuts to not think that feminine beauty is being bean pole skinny. Save that for my little brother!

Be real, and do the healthy thing for yourself. I guess that is what I am trying to do for myself, and I hope that it goes ok for you. Take care, and good luck on the job hunt.


5:37 AM  

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