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Thursday, January 19, 2006

Morning Glory

"Be pleasant until ten o'clock in the morning and the rest of the day will take care of itself." ~Elbert Hubbard

It started off at 5:30 AM actually make that 5:20 AM when I hit the snooze. I’ve been waking at this obscene ass crack of dawn hour to go to the gym everyday this week. That is except for Saturday and Sunday when I got up at 8:30 AM. I think the word you’re looking for here is ‘motherfucker’.

I couldn’t find my bra. At 8 AM not being able to find one’s bra already blows, but at 5:30 AM, I’m as disgruntle as a postal office worker five days before christmas. Wandering around my room saying “fuck”. Bra Least favorite bra, found. Least favorite workout pants on, because the others ended up soaking wet when I decided that being outside in the rain at 6 AM was a swell idea. Hair. Oh god, my hair. At night, sometimes I twist it, so it looks less afro-y and more curly. Strange but true. Last night I did it perfectly and this morning, things were still intact. That is until I realized that I’d have to be in public with my hair in little twists all over my head. Spend 8 minutes attempting to rearrange twists and find acceptable head wear, as to not come off looking like someone’s Mamie.

So at 5:45 AM, lunch packed, gym bag, fail proof outfit (gray pants, purple cashmere sweater, white cami, fuck me boots), and my work shit, I’m out the door; with my crappy ass sports bra and yes, I do look like someone’s Mamie. Spend the 15 minute walk to the gym, swearing that if anyone looked at me funny, they’d have my foot so far up their ass, that when they opened their mouth, people would see my perfectly pedicured toes. Also think about Zach from American Idol last night. Zach who is a boy, but looked very much like a female. Laugh the rest of the way to the gym.

Best. Workout. All. Week.

Fuck yeah.

8 AM work, with fail proof outfit and perfectly formed coif and in a perfectly wonderful mood. I’m giving it until 10:15 AM when I will turn back into disgruntle post office worker Heather, who has no problem rolling her eyes and giving the finger.

15 Comments:

Blogger Dirk the Feeble said...

I think it's great that you walk to the gym. I like the people who drive to the gym when they live across the street, then take the escalator up to the front doors, then complain that there's no elevator to get them to the top floor. That's hilarious.

9:48 AM  
Anonymous MappyB said...

congrats on your good workout! don't you hate it when the good workout feeling wears off, like you said, around 10am. man.

10:49 AM  
Blogger DC Cookie said...

You are officially my hero. When my alarm goes off that early every morning, I hit snooze 18 times, and skip the gym. Every time. Mornings just don't agree with me.

12:13 PM  
Blogger Pink Lemonade Diva said...

well of course you'll revert at some point - when the copier jams, the line is long at Starbucks, your Metrocard is out of $; but the important thing is that you did indeed experience that residual high and spring in your step after a great workout. loved that.

12:13 PM  
Blogger Lizzie said...

5:30?!? I'm impressed. I thought the fact that I got out of bed before 10 (9:58 to be exact) was something to be proud of. AND you bring your lunch to work instead of spending the money to eat out every day? I'm with DC Cookie - you are my hero.

1:00 PM  
Blogger Heather B. said...

Armaedes: The gym I belong to has a branch in georgetown that has an escalator up to it. Some woman had the nerve to ask why the up escalator was broken the other day. Sheesh.

Mappy B: So far so good, thankfully. But I probably just jinxed myself.

DCC: but getting up that early had me having a case of FOMO last night. But thanks!

PLD: ok, umm it's 1:30 and I'm about to revert...commence rolling of eyes.

Lizzie: I don't spend money on lunch during the week because I spend enough for a family of 4 on groceries every weekend.

1:38 PM  
Blogger Larissa said...

wow, i don't remember the last time i got up that early...high school? kudos to you for being super human ;-)

1:43 PM  
Blogger the belligerent intellectual said...

The only reason someone should be up at 5:20 is because they are having sex or because they are running from the police and they heard a noise outside.

2:50 PM  
Blogger AJH said...

Although I know how awesome I will feel if I start my day with a workout, I just can't get over that initial crappy feeling.
I'd never make my 8am Sat training runs if I didn't pack all my shit and lay out all my clothes Friday pm. I know it's incredibly dorky, but it takes some of the stress out of having to function at that obscene hour.

2:58 PM  
Blogger wunelle said...

5-fucking-20? You need to look into being a cargo pilot. Nobody in their right mind is up at that hour ;-)

3:23 PM  
Anonymous Angela said...

Hahaha...Zachary... hahahahaha... Fabulous.

4:01 PM  
Blogger ejtakeslife said...

Good for you, Heather! Sorry to have missed you at Mackey's, though. Alas, the price one must pay for kicking pre-dawn ass.

4:04 PM  
Blogger Tanisha said...

Girl American Idol has had me laughing for the whole week.. "I shot the sherrif--but I didn't kill hte deputy"..OY vey.. Love the new site and good luck with the workout. I failed this week but next week it is..

4:25 PM  
Blogger darlin nikki said...

ha, that's why i bring lunch to work myself :) and people think how frugal! little do they know...

11:42 PM  
Blogger LisaBinDaCity said...

Isn't that always the way it is?!

Good girl for going to the gym!

8:57 AM  

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