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Wednesday, May 17, 2006


"There's a period of life when we swallow a knowledge of ourselves and it becomes either good or sour inside. " ~Pearl Bailey

I think that if I had taken up Marine Biology or Economic History as originally planned, I would have something much more interesting to say.

Don’t get me wrong, I love what decisions I’ve made in that regard, but my daily life isn’t nearly as enthralling as feeding a baby penguin might be or delving into laissez-faire capitalism.

What’s key, is wording. Something enticing…something that makes people say “wow” when you talk to them. Though on a normal basis, I can have that affect, but I would say that it’s more stunned silence and thoughts of “but you seem like such an idiot…” Duly noted. And thank you for having such confidence in me, because my self esteem hadn’t hit rock bottom quite yet. I don’t really find myself to be terribly fascinating person. I kind of just go about my day and random shit happens and then I go home and watch an inordinate amount of television and contemplate living in seclusion.

In a meeting a few weeks ago, I was asked what I do on a daily basis. Like from sun up to sun down. I looked quizzically at the asker and wondered whether or not it is really possible to bore someone to death. I mean it varies and depends on my ever changing mood. There’s no complaining it just is what it is and I’ve learned to accept that and move on. While speaking with Chase a few weeks ago, we were both equally fascinated by each other’s day to day life. She noted (I was too drunk to note anything) that people are always more intrigued by other’s lives than they are about their own. Which is entirely true and I would say human nature. It doesn’t mean that one is unhappy with one’s own life, but one gets so used to the day to day things, that it all just becomes routine.

Por ejemplo, today, if I began a rundown of the exciting things that I’ve done today (gave the new intern a tour! Watched Monster in Law! Contemplated what to do with myself this evening given that I don’t think I have to baby-sit! Researched The Deer Hunter and how to make a Hugh Laurie-Taylor Hicks hybrid! Wheeeeeee!), you’d probably have me lynched and thrown in the
Anacostia River.

Come to think of it, I like how routine things have become. It’s funny how the everyday things can make or break a mood. And I take great pride in the fact that I’ve molded myself into a person- nay woman – who can finally enjoy things the way that they are. That, my friends, is key.


Anonymous Jorge said...

I never used to be happy with who I was until I learned that I wasn't such a bad bloke (I figure, if you use Hugh Laurie in there, I should talk like him).

I'm much happier now.

We need to start a club.

Hey, I smell petrol....

3:54 PM  
Blogger KassyK said...

I agree Heather. I have friends that thrive on drama and business and all personally, I'm low key as well...take it easy, enjoy yourself...these are the keys to a happy life while doing some fun, interesting things in the meantime.

My past few months have quite literally been chaotic--to the point that most would have been insitutionalized dealing with this crap and that when it hit me....I HATE DRAMA.

Even the most boring shit is interesting to someone...:-)

10:48 AM  
Blogger KassyK said...

PS-Which is not to say that we are boring...FUCK no :-)I read your stuff for a reason....

10:49 AM  

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