“Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius.” ~George Bernard Shaw
Having actually left my house this morning at the appointed time, in order to stop and get gas, I was feeling very much in control, which I thoroughly enjoy. I was clad in a recently returned from the dry cleaners outfit and wearing flip flops (Vineyard Vines, if you must know) when I headed into the gas station.
I pumped, removed some garbage and awaited my fate. I had put the little clippy thing down, so that I could remove debris (seriously, there was a fucking tomato piece in my car. Possibly from chipotle. Yeah, I can drive and eat a burrito but only semi-successfully). When I hit about $45 for gas, I decided that that would be enough. Actually my paltry bank account decided that that would be enough. Which is when I made the oh so brilliant decision to yank. YANK - the gas nozzle from the tank, of course forgetting that it was still pumping given that I had put the little clip down
Gas. Everywhere. On my pants, my shirt, the shirt I was wearing under my other shirt, my hand, my feet. Fucking everywhere. And in complete shock over my brilliance, I kind of just stood there bewildered. Maybe even thinking about a stray match or ash that might come swooping over and blow my ass up to kingdom come.
I can see the headlines now “22 Year old DC resident, blown to bits after spilling a gallon of gasoline all over her stupid, stupid self. Witnesses say that it was a ‘spectacular event’” It would’ve been like fucking Helios going across the morning sky.
Common sense, I never knew ye.
edit to add: Because everyone loves to hear about consumerism; I spent a grand total of $53 on gas this morning, which probably included what was wasted on my favorite Anthropologie shirt. I drive a fucking sable. Last I checked, a sable isn't an H3, but I could be wrong.