The prettiest woman
“You are my shinin' star, my guiding light, my love fantasy”* – Luther Vandross
Last night (Read: 3:45 AM) I took a shuttle from Love to the Convention Center. If you know DC, you know that thee area between the two spots is shotty at best and you’d be best carrying a can of mace or a .38. Seated a row back and to the left of me was an older man, in his 50’s, with a fedora complete with feather. Other people were also in the seats surrounding us. When traveling I sit by the window and usually stare out and pay no attention and get lost in my own little world.
While doing such, there is a commotion coming from where the fedora clad man – I forgot to mention the zoot suit and red handkerchief in his breast pocket. We’re stopped at a light and he’s scrambling to open the window. He’s clawing at it trying to pry it open as quickly as possible. The shuttle is full and all turn around to see the cause of this man’s angst.
He finally is able to open the window and yells out “Wait right there! I’ll be right back,” while he holds onto the window then a “Shit” .A perfunctory drawn out ‘shit’. Shock maybe of his sheer luck at his find.
We all turn to see to whom he is hollering at and there at the corner is a ‘woman.’ ‘Woman’ is a term that I use loosely because what stood before us was some 6 foot tall person with an obvious weave sporting a mesh yellow mini dress, black undergarments clearly visible.
There’s laughter and then a man at the front turns around and yells “That’s a man!”
To which fedora clad man, pushes his head out the window and hollers, “You a man?!? You got a dick?!? You got a dick under there??” Then straightens his hat and tie and sits back down and announces that that is “I don’t care what she is. That’s the best looking thing I’ve ever seen.”
*There’s nothing like dancing with your coworkers to Luther at 2:15 AM, mouthing “Oh my looooove”. It truly was a lovely weekend.