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Thursday, December 14, 2006

Moving on

“It is necessary to write, if the days are not to slip emptily by. How else, indeed, to clap the net over the butterfly of the moment? For the moment passes, it is forgotten; the mood is gone; life itself is gone. That is where the writer scores over his fellows: he catches the changes of his mind on the hop.” ~Vita Sackville-West

As the founder and president of Over Thinkers Anonymous™ it’s my duty to you know, think things over and obsess and really put my nose to the grindstone on every little detail and hot damn, I’m fucking awesome at it. But much like all things that are fairly routine, I’m starting to realize that’s getting a little old and my obsessive nature is just bothersome and overly tiring. I mean, try spending two solid hours devising the most illogical scheme possible and then making it seem as if yes! That totally makes sense! Why don’t you follow?! It’s damn hard and now I’m terribly tired.

So now I’m toying with divulging more about the oysters of love over at Acadiana or why I am most certainly not a home wrecker, or how I baked magic cookie bars last night that got stuck to the bottom of my good pyrex dish, or how I find footless leggings to be God’s gift to the free world, or you know more about my holiday (let’s be PC now shall we?) shopping is so not even started, or a myriad of other boring ass things, that I can make seem really interesting, but ummm, no.

Instead I leave you with the following, which I wrote for BlogHer. I’m sharing it with you all because I never share anything that I write there over here for no particular reason other than, I’m lazy and if I write about my personal finances etc here, then there’s less time for incessant and unnecessary complaining. Which we all will agree I’m really terrific at.

S.I.N.King and loving it

It’s pretty much been the same tune sung day in and day out in regards to the fund crisis that is the life of a 20 something. It’s not necessarily crisis but it can be mildly frustrating and while there are aspects to being in your early 20’s, like a high metabolism and it being acceptable to have a constant hangover, it’s still just a nagging thing that I’m sure I will laugh about in the end. And while I will readily complain about the former, I cannot say that I don’t enjoy having a rather disposable income. I can do pretty much what I want, when I want and if I really wanted to pack up and move across the country tomorrow, there is no one else that I would have to check in with. If I wanted to invest in Alpaca and make a new career as a sheep herder, then no one can stop me. It’s actually quite a beautiful thing and to quote Dave Matthew’s I shall miss these things when it all rolls by.

The reason I began blogging was because it was a platform to discuss/whine about the above. That the immediate time after college where you’re pretty much in flux with things, is rather tumultuous and given that 99% of people happen to go through it, I felt that there would be some sort of support or something there. And as the time has gone on and I do have an avid ‘You rock’ etc. readership, it’s not the same, being a single female blogger (since blogging can be very niche like) and getting that same support mechanism of say a female who happened to have a child, for instance.

I write the above with extreme trepidation because I don’t want to be labeled a hater of those who write blogs of the parenting genre, mostly because I don’t dislike and embrace them with enthusiasm, hell, I garner much of my disposable income from babysitting for a “Mommy blogger” but I do find it all rather interesting. I was speaking with another blogger about this earlier in that I am a single person with no kids (Single Income No Kids) and like I said, disposable income, from a business stand point it would make sense to swoop me up and offer me things and realize that with my disposable income, I can buy whatever I feel like buying, but alas they don’t. Not to mention (deep breaths) that ad offers aren’t the same either, I mean it’s a known fact that bloggers who are parents are considerably more desirable than those of us without children. It’s not a criticism but just a true fact.

But like I said, I don’t dislike parent bloggers I just find it interesting the way women in particular will flock to another woman if she is pregnant but if I were to get a new job or decide to make a career change into acrobatics, I doubt anyone would be equally as enthralled with my journey and/or search me out for premium ad space. It’s just how it goes and you can be assured that I’m not the only SINK (or Dual Income No Kids) who is equally flummoxed by this entire “parent blogging brings all the ads/love to the yard”, phenomenon.

An excerpt from a very excellent post by Stacy of Jurgen Nation:

The bloggers I read faithfully are, in my mind, friends. Some of them are parents, some aren’t. I don’t really think of them in terms of mommies or daddies, I think of them as [blogger] friends - “Blends”, if you will.

What bothers me is not that the Mommy Bloggers have a network. Nay, what vexes me is that the personal bloggers, i.e., the SINKs (Single Income, No Kids! Hi Mom! Over Here!) and DINKs (Double Income, No Kids) don’t have this built-in support system. The Mommy Blogger has that extra wonderful layer. If you’ve never witnessed the Mommy Bloggers in action, it’s truly astonishing. They form an umbrella of support and cheerleading for each other; one could even describe it as “mothering” or “nurturing” (I know!). It’s almost as if, when a new mom starts a new blog The Moms form a caucus, the sole purpose of which is to pair that new mommy blogger up with a mentor or buddy until she gets the hang of it and becomes A Mommy Blogger (echo, echo). And then, like bees, they all descend on each each other to encourage, cheer, support.

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