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Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Hot like me

"Establishing goals is all right if you don't let them deprive you of interesting detours." ~Doug Larson

I had this rather garrulous literary masterpiece three quarters written about my propensity for being a lush, versus my roommate’s propensity for looking at me funny when I say “holy fucking hangover”. All of which went to the wayside when during the premiere of ANTM, there was a long preview for a new reality show in search of the next…great…PUSSYCAT DOLL. Almost like being the next…great…BEATLE, but with less clothing and more eyeliner and acrylic nails.

I watched in awe as girl after girl sat teary eyed and confessed that being a pussycat doll was what they wanted in life more than anything. How it would change their world forever and all carried signs that said “Live Pussycat or Die!”

I’ve had some crazy goals in life, ranging from neonatology to fictional novelist to Ballerina, which I know, right with the size of my ass. But never before nor will I ever, get on camera, in front of a million and ten people and announce that I, Heather B, have the aspirations to dance in my bra and boy shorts, with my ass cheeks hanging out, lip synching that I would love nothing more than for Snoop Dogg to push up on my buttons, baby.



Blogger metalia said...

Oh, lord. I Tivo'd ANTM, and cannot WAIT to see that preview.

I weep for the future.

12:00 AM  
Anonymous Abigail said...

Dude. I just got back from watching ANTM and am all geared up to blog about it. And we too were mesmorized by the Pussycat show. They totally sucked me in. I just kept saying "it's like a whore contest! This is so awesome! Who can be the biggest whore!"

1:29 AM  
Anonymous MappyB said...

I, too, watched ANTM, but I just couldn't bring myself to watch the Doll show. Man.....

7:28 AM  
Blogger Dagny said...

Oooo. Now I have something to look forward to when I watch ANTM later today. I had been seeing the short trailers for the PCD show but this one sounds spectacular. Thanks for the heads up.

10:07 AM  
Blogger Jennie said...

The fact that I have ANTM on TiVo at home is the only thing getting me through work today. Oh, Nigel Barker (said in British accent)!

10:16 AM  
Blogger Heather B. said...

Seriously, you guys, these girls were in tears and talking about their hopes and their dreams as if their goals were the US Senate, not half naked dancing.

10:43 AM  
Anonymous Jorge said...

Please don't die.

Our lives are not so important as for us to expect that everyone should know what's going on at all times.

Of course, if you didn't know, it means you don't read my blog or you couldn't figure it out...

So do you admit to being negligent or thick?


The SMART person would lay blame on Kris for not sharing, though...


Hugs and forgiveness...

PS: The forgiveness is contingent upon you getting your booty up here for a visit.

PPS: It's raw like meat by the way.

12:43 PM  
Blogger PretaMulatta said...


ok, ANTM? i cant even tolerate tyra on the commercials 4 this show, so i clearly missed the preview of the show, BUT... this is where reality tv is now.

and what little girls want 2 b when they grow up!

ass shaking, scantily clad celebrities... at least some of the dolls are really talented. hopefully SOMETHING good will come out of it.

but i doubt it.

and am i the only one who remembers the original wb/cw show called 'POPSTARS' which spawned Eden's Crush, who's really talented singer was none other than Nicole, who is NOW the lead cat in PCD?

yeah... i'm a fan! so what?


1:23 PM  
Blogger mm said...

That was hilarious. It was great meeting you last night!

11:44 AM  
Blogger brandy said...

Not only am I watching ANTM, I'm actually in a pool. I should feel bad about this, but my energy is being spent feeling bad about watching Flava Flav's show....

1:12 AM  

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